2. Wine from a big white box was meant to be chugged as quickly as possible because nobody really thinks it’s “good”.
My first exposure to wine was in my cousin’s backyard over the Fourth of July. I asked my mom for a sip of her pink fermented beverage that came from a big white box. My mom, in her wisdom, smiled and handed me her glass.
I took a sip.
I gagged.
I looked disbelievingly at the adults around me, sipping their pink wine and could not fathom why anyone would willingly drink a glass of the vile stuff, much less an entire box.
It wasn’t until I was much older, studying for my degree, and waiting tables that I tried wine again. By then I had discovered some things about wine.
1. Wine is meant to be sipped. Slowly. The darker the wine, the slower the sip.
2. Wine from a big white box was meant to be chugged as quickly as possible because nobody really thinks it’s “good”.
3. Wine is complex and delightful, and even refreshing under the right circumstances.
Officially, wine is the beverage of choice for stressed out moms and folks with celiac disease and dirty bums in Charlie Chaplin movies. Unofficially, frozen wine is beverage of choice for people who like wine, hate rules, and still have a penchant for playful living even though they are Real Adults. Wine slushies give you all the benefits of being an adult with all the joys of being a kid with a slushy boozy drink in your hand.
If you tend to eschew your inner child and prefer to feel somewhat sophisticated and faux-healthy, you can call a frozen wine drink a smoothie and it totally counts. Because we are all of a legal drinking age here and there is no shame in consuming your daily super fruit serving in a nutritious, fermented, frozen liquid form. The best part about all of this is you don’t need GOOD wine, you just need not-chardonnay.
Ingredients:
1 bottle Riesling
2 ice cube trays
1 cup frozen mango
1 Tbsp fresh grated ginger
Raspberry liquor (Chambord is a popular one)
Directions:
Open wine (you’re good at this part). Pour into ice cube trays and freeze overnight. Cubes will be soft, but still hold together. You should probably taste one, just in case. It’s a smoothie-slushy-thingy, remember? There are no rules. Reserve the leftover wine for tomorrow’s slushy making.
Add frozen mango, ginger, and leftover wine to a blender and blend until smooth. Add wine cubes and blend more.
Pour the frozen beverage into a chilled glass, drizzle with raspberry liquor and sip with a straw. This is a totally acceptable and appropriate time drink wine through a straw, FYI.
Cheers and many adult slushies to you this summer!
